I always considered myself a lucky girl. I was born into a loving family with two deeply engaged parents, and a brother I adored. At only two years old, I moved from Newburgh, New York to the beach town of Hilton Head Island, South Carolina. It was there that I began a charmed childhood.
My father worked in the real estate business and my mother was a stay-at-home mom who often had a day as long, or longer, than my father. I was fortunate to live in a beautiful place and, as children, we were taught to enjoy the nature that surrounded us. My brother and I were both strong athletes, with tennis being our primary focus. As a student, I took school very seriously, and worked hard to make sure I accomplished goals that would allow me the opportunity to get into the college of my choice. By the age of seventeen, I had won the International Science and Engineering Fair, was a highly ranked junior tennis player, was President of various clubs and organizations, and appeared on the cover of USA Today as one of their All-USA High School Academic (First Team) top-twenty students in the country. This secured a spot for me at Princeton University. I felt on top of the world.
Upon graduation, although I had always planned to be a doctor, I was hesitant about the lifestyle it would provide for me. My concern was that one day, I would be torn too much between work and my family. This hesitation to pursue my childhood dream led me away from medical school to a career in cancer research. I figured it was a way to utilize my science background and still have a more reasonable work schedule. Ultimately, I moved from a lab in New Jersey to an office in New York City, and focused my efforts in the healthcare business development/ sales arena. Despite some ups and downs in the world of romance, I finally met a fellow New Yorker by the name of Kevin. In 1998 we tied the knot in the small town of Greensboro, GA. Our jobs eventually took us south to Georgia.
After several years of marriage, we decided it was time to start a family. Kevin thought it would be easy. I knew it might take a few months to get pregnant, but imagined that as a young, healthy couple, it would be relatively simple for us to conceive and have a baby. Little did I know that our journey to bring children into our lives would be an arduous path—one filled with multiple miscarriages, infertility, early pregnancy loss, late-term pregnancy loss, surrogacy, and more. My seemingly perfect life had unraveled, and I was left with a heartache I never could have imagined- followed by a joyfulness for which there are no words to describe, until you’ve known the love for your child.
An equally important part of my journey was the change I experienced in my faith. I went from a compliant Christian to a woman who wondered what kind of a God would impose so many struggles in my life. I mistakenly thought I was immune to the sufferings that many other people had endured. It wasn’t logical of me to believe that—I think I felt that way because things had always gone so well for me. My hard work and perseverance had always brought me the outcomes I desired. I had escaped the interaction with any sort of major trauma in my younger years, literally until the day I turned thirty years old.
Today, I am blessed to say that I have a significantly renewed faith in God, and I have learned that His divine plan served a larger purpose. I now see the gift in the adversity I faced. It was not until I had this perspective that I was able to find peace despite the horrific path we had travelled to bring our children into this world. It was a passion to share our story with other women/couples—in an effort to help them the way I needed help—that led me to write Making Angels. The book is not only for the men and women who can’t conceive, or who have lost a baby. It’s also for the friends and family who intend to support us, but perhaps say the wrong thing or fail to understand what it’s like to walk in our shoes.
I currently live in Greensboro, Georgia with my husband, Kevin, our two boys, Tyler and Drew, and our one-hundred-five-pound Rhodesian Ridgeback, Cody (who seems to take up the space of a small horse). My day is filled with a variety of activities that range from writing, to fundraising, to all the typical stay-at-home mom sort of stuff. I love to cook, enjoy time on the lake, and do anything that involves my family. To learn more specifically about our journey to have children, please read Our Story.